Relationships during Lockdown

Couple with arms linked


 

3rd May, 2020

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Is Your Relationship Under Stress during the Lockdown?

SmartLoving BreakThrough Online is for anyone whose relationship is going through a period of stress and disillusionment.  It’s from the providers of the Marriage Preparation Course that currently runs in our Pastoral Area.

BreakThrough is an online course that teaches participants how conflict arises, and how to take simple steps to heal the wounds and restore hope.  It is private, confidential and effective and can be worked through in three hours, either individually or together.

Currently there’s a reduced price of £24: if that cost is prohibitive for you and, as finances are a major difficulty just now for so many people, email mflnrcd@gmail.com as they will be able to offer some assistance for those in greatest need and they will send you an access code.  Your email will be strictly confidential and used in line with GDPR.  For more details, see https://smartloving.org/bto-uk


hands of bride and groom joined

 26th April, 2020

Tips For Couples To Survive The Coronavirus Lock Down

The Coronavirus is not just a threat to our physical health – it’s also a challenge to our relationships.  Across the world, couples are rediscovering the joy – and the pain – of living together 24/7.  Without warning, billions of previously interdependent spouses now share living AND workspace with each other and with their children under various lock down protocols.  For some, this is a welcome disruption to their routine but for others, it’s bringing into sharp focus the abrasive edges of their relationships.   How do we deal with this wild pandemic situation and channel it’s energy for good in our families and in our relationship?

Here are some tips from the authors of the marriage courses we use in our parishes.

Change the Direction of Your Marriage!
https://smartloving.org/lockdown-show-down/

 It’s easy to get discouraged by our disconnection; arguments over petty incidents, too busy to romance each other, crowded with other responsibilities.  We all experience this especially during this time of isolation.  But there is a way to BreakThrough the resentment and re-establish connection.

All marriages go through periods of stress and disillusionment.  It’s important for all of us to be proactive in keeping our marriages healthy by healing any hurts we may have accumulated and resolving any resentment.

Follow the SmartLoving BreakThrough Course

 This is an online course that teaches participants how conflict arises, and how to take simple steps to heal the wounds and restore hope.  It is private, confidential and effective and can be worked through in three hours.  Watch the short video at  https://smartloving.org/breakthrough/

  • Learn how arguments happen: manage them better or avoid them altogether
  • Understand your internal drivers: and how your spouse is triggering you
  • Process the pain of past injuries: making you stronger and less reactive
  • Restore hope for your relationship’s future: with practical strategies

Marriages: some food for thought…

During the closure of our church and hall, we have ensured that our marriage preparation courses continue to be offered using our programme’s online facility at  https://smartloving.org/uk/

With the ever increasing pressures on marriages and family life, it is more important now than ever to reveal to engaged couples the beauty and true meaning of this sacrament in our Church.

The latest figures for marriages in England and Wales reveal that the number of men and women getting married has fallen to a new low.  In 2017, there were a total of 235,910 marriages between opposite-sex couples – a decrease of 2.8% from 2016, and a decrease of 45% in the past 45 years.  Only 22% of marriages were religious in 2017, the lowest percentage on record.  In addition, around 81% of couples that had a religious ceremony cohabited before they got married.

Interestingly, cohabitation has been shown to significantly increase the divorce rate!  There are complex reasons for this, one being that the criteria one may have for selecting a ‘cohabiting partner’ is much lower than one would have for an intended ‘life-time partner’.  Once cohabiting, it can become difficult to break up as constraints naturally accumulate, eg: shared furniture, pets, bank accounts and so on.  This ‘commitment creep’ can cause couples to never make a decisive choice to become life-long partners, but rather slide into marriage without a deep felt commitment to the marriage itself.